You needn’t tell me that a man who doesn’t love oysters and asparagus and good wines has got a soul, or a stomach either. He’s simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.

The German asparagus are fabulous.

I would follow my mother around the kitchen watching and trying to find any way to help. One of the first dishes my mother taught me to make was hollandaise sauce. Though she always served it with broccoli, I soon realized it was equally delicious with asparagus, artichokes, or any other vegetable.

Are you casting asparagus on my cooking?

Good luck with your asparagus.

I’ve done a lot of kale as well as broccoli. I love it. Asparagus I couldn’t stand before, but now it is part of my meals. All three of those are greens that I never used to eat. Now, a smoothie for me is nothing but fruits and veggies and vanilla Greek yogurt.

What is that smell? (Nick) (It was like three-day-old cat vomit mixed with rotten asparagus.) Duck urine. It keeps the zombies from thinking I’m human. (Mark) Yeah, well it keeps me from thinking you’re sane. (Nick)

It’s Major Ketchup in the bathroom with the laser scalpel.” “Hmm.” He sliced a delicately herbed spear of asparagus. “Obviously we were meant for each other as I can interpret that as you meaning something more like Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with the candlestick.

I look forward to the spring vegetables because the season is so short. Mushrooms, edible foraged herbs, wild leeks, early season asparagus.

I go for crunchy things – I like green beans, broccoli, asparagus, celery and carrots. I’m not a fruit eater, though.

For dinner, I’ll grill chicken with asparagus and call it a day.

Marriage? It’s like asparagus eaten with vinaigrette or hollandaise, a matter of taste but of no importance.

I’m sauteing asparagus, Brussels sprouts,broccoli, some boneless, skinless chicken breast, some halibut. That’s about it; that’s all I’m allowed. That’s what’s legal for me to saute.

That’s like buying asparagus and then leaving it at the checkout. Why would you do that?

It’s a lot harder to get people to ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ over beets and carrots than it is to get them to ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ over artichokes or asparagus, and I enjoy being able to take these humble, ‘lowbrow‘ foodstuffs up a few notches and serve them with great exuberance.

The love of reading can be contagious.

In Zurich, in a cafe overlooking the Limmat, I ate butter-drenched white asparagus pulled from the ground that morning; it had the aftertaste of champagne. I’ve been able to appreciate epic meals in San Francisco, New Orleans, Berlin, Paris, Las Vegas.

He’s simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.

One word, in this place, respecting asparagus. The young shoots of this plant, boiled, are the most unexceptionable form of greens with which I am acquainted.

Eating foods like asparagus and celery will help keep you full and debloat you.

Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity would sit down and eat a steak with Keith Olbermann and Barack Obama before they would dine on tofu and asparagus with me!

Government has to be cut back like asparagus… every day… or it gets away and goes to seed. Ours did. When there’s too much of it, the flower becomes a weed.

I revere the memory of Mr. F. as an estimable man and most indulgent husband, only necessary to mention Asparagus and it appeared or to hint at any little delicate thing to drink and it came like magic in a pint bottle; it was not ecstasy but it was comfort.

my rebelliousness went so deep that, faced with a can of asparagus that instructed me to open at this end, I always, stubbornly, opened it at the other.

Good asparagus needs minimal treatment and is best eaten with few other ingredients.

I’m kind of a grandma, so I like cooking for my boyfriend and watching a movie. I cook a lot, actually. I’ll make bacon-wrapped asparagus, steak, and pesto pasta with chicken…but we go out to dinner a fair amount, too.

Asparagus in a lean in a lean is to hot. This makes it art and it is wet weather wet weather wet

Actually I love asparagus.

Let there be seasons so that our tongues will be rich in asparagus and limes.

Asparagus inspires gentle thoughts.

I try to get them working. My older son is 10 and he‘s pretty interested. We had a dinner party the other night and he helped a lot. He helped peel asparagus; he hung out. It was great.

… if we have a dollar to spend on some wild excess, we shall spend it on a book, not on asparagus out of season.

(on asparagus) Europeans of the Renaissance swore by it as an aphrodisiac, and the church banned it from nunneries.

Romesco with asparagus is simple and brilliant.

Microsoft has a new version out, Windows XP, which according to everybody is the ‘most reliable Windows ever.’ To me, this is like saying that asparagus is ‘the most articulate vegetable ever.’